Ntando Ntlokwana

Count Your Blessings...             You will be so amazed! I can still remember clearly the Sunday I opened my eyes and felt grateful and so much peace in my heart. I felt love and I thought I was dreaming. I called out “Sthandwasami”, and there was no response, looked at my wall, saw the picture of my dream home still there, surely I am not inside it, then I listened for some cartoon sounds, and heard none, again surely there is no child in the house… I was even tempted to go to the garage to check if my dream car was there…but I was starting to realise that nothing had changed, it was my life as I knew it. Then I wondered why? Why I felt so happy and at peace? As I pulled my blankets, I couldn’t help but feel the cold breeze and I realised that I had been warm the whole time, I was under blankets and was warm the whole night. Then I got out of bed and had a glance of my face on the mirror, I looked so cute and “healt...

HE is my Jehova  …… The author of my life My current whats app status is “He is my Jehova”.  I’ve been saying this a lot lately and it was real not a big deal as it came naturally for me to type these words in my social media platforms, even in my diary.  So today someone asked me, what I meant by “ He is My Jehova”…. It got me thinking, I smiled obviously as those who know me personally know that, that is one thing I do when I'm happy, or not so sure what to say or do. So I did not answer this person, but I thought about what I real meant when I say these words. I remembered that at school we were taught that you must fear God and respect him or else He will punish you… at church, I was taught about a punishing God, wherever I went, I was introduced to this God who would only bless me because I have been a good person or I have been obedient. Up until I met God, the God I call My Jehova, the God I tremble just thinking about what he has done in ...

My Beautiful Sisters…. My Brothers Yes My beautiful Sisters My Brothers… I call you my brothers because you play a role of being brothers to me… you protected me when I was scared,  fed me when I was hungry, and clothed me when naked. When I felt like God was too far to hear my prayers I ran to you, not even once you turned me away, you always had some wise words to tell me, you tried your best to make sure that no one could hurt me, and if I was already hurting you searched for comforting words to sooth my pain… If it meant crying together with me, that’s what you did so that I could feel that I am not alone… hence I call you My Beautiful Sisters my Brothers…. When those who were supposed to protect us left… God doubled your strength He made you very strong so that you can protect our family, you became brothers that I could be proud of, you became the pillar of our family and you made sure that when our parents look at you they see the miraculo...

I know those who know me in person will laugh when they read my tittle, I will not give the inside joke away though... I know its been months since I posted anything, I guess I had what they call the writers block,  or I was just trying to deal with everything that has been happening in the year 2014. This was not a greatest year to be honest, a year filled with so much loss in my life. I real thought 2013, was bad, but 2014, was even worst.    As much as this year was so painful for me, but somehow there was so much growth that came with it, I learned so much in both my personal and business space, however the greatest lesson was that life is so amazingly short, I once posted a piece titled " Life is just a vapour", I think then, I still didn't get it that life is real like a blade of grass, a petal of a rose, a mist that disappears each time the sun rises. In the same spirit I learnt to appreciate those in my life, who made all the aforementi...

MY GREATEST FEAR… Those who are close to me know how much love this piece of writing “Our Greatest Fear” which Nelson Mandela once read. It has always been those poems when I feel like I am not good enough I would read and it would somehow motivate me. This morning though, when I was jogging, I kept on thinking about the things I have feared the most in my life. As a child, I was just good enough, I would pass at school, I was not an A student, but I was okey in my times we had top ten’s, so I would try to keep myself in that category. If I think about it, I always wanted to do better and it was my greatest fear to fail. As I grew a bit older the fear of failing in life grew with me and guess what, I failed in some of the things I wanted to do. It did not kill me though, but the fact was that, one thing I had feared the most had happened. Then I got to understand love, and relationships, my fear changed completely, my greatest fear became the fear of   losing those I ...

I t is W ell W ith M y S oul Since the passing of yet another loving brother of ours’, I can’t help but to think, real why are we here? I started to look back and remembering what had been so special about this life that we have lost in a space of five years, after we had lost our last born brother, who we also lost five years after we had lost another brother. Is it just a coincidence or that is how God has planned it or we did something wrong with the number five? These are questions my family is scared to ask, but I am certain we are all thinking about. When the helmets have been raised, hands waved and the coffin has went down, there is real nothing we can change, except being grateful to God for giving us such honour to have been siblings to him. We called him many things, His dad called him Kwekwe, his mom called him Bongy, his wife called him Babes, his brother called him Machel, his son called him Babah, his nieces and nephews called him Babo’ Mdala and us his beaut...

What if you knew that when: You approach that beautiful lady she would say yes, You write the board exams you would pass You write your book it will change people's lives You write that song or poem people will be healed You start that business it will prosper You take that first step you will finish the race or reach the top of that mountain You painted that painting it would be a masterpiece You were the one who will come up with the cure of HIV? What if we knew that we could achieve any thing... where would we be? , how many lives would be changed, if we understood that our playing small does not serve the world, if we knew that individual success is not taken from someone else's ...   What if we real knew that God created us to have dominion over everything, that we were called to be royalty, if we knew that Jesus said, " greater things THAN THIS you will do"...  ... the truth is, all the above can be achieved, the only thing...